The call that artists receive from other artists…
“Hey, I am calling you, but no, I do not want to speak to you.” I am calling you because of some overwhelming and innate desire to see your work, to piss on it, to say mine is better.
No, I am not your friend.
Artists don’t have friends.
But yes, I do want to see your work.
And before I take a good close look, I hate it.
Oh wait, yes, don’t worry I hate you too, now that I’ve come all the way out here to see this work I hate, I’ve suddenly realized I have an overwhelming burning hatred deep inside my soul for you–not just your work, but you.
Look at how you fuck the camel hair on your brushes. Look at the splatters everywhere. You use a can? A straw? That’s not art. You’re not an artist. You’re a fake, and I hate you. Goddamn Lasceaux straw blowing fool.
Your work isn’t even work. It’s garbage. You are Delaware and your ‘art?’ Your so-called ‘art’ is an attempt at weening what little hope you have of feeling for any of the pathetic minstrels we now call humans from your hands onto canvas. It has nothing to do with form or color or line. Your ‘art’ is self-serving creative masturbation. Intellectual vanity at its worst with the highest of labels. Salingerian in its scope of phony. You sick, sad fuck.
“Do you have any wine? How did you mix that red? Where’s that girl, the pretty one with the curl in her hair that’s always around? The one that brings you bread and cheese for lunch? You know, the one we all love?” She has a kiss on the left side of her cheek, right here?Yes, that’s her name.I hate her too.
As a disclaimer, I must say I consider myself both a practicing artist and a professional designer. For those of you who are professional, practicing artists, this is not meant for you. I admire and respect you greatly and as a professional designer, I would gladly practice professional art professionally as a practitioner of art for the purpose of bringing income–at least, in practice. I am envious and hope to follow a path that bridges many of the gaps so often thrown up between our ilk.